She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize