dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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