Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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