Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
splinters make it hard to masturbate
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
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