Having a random hookup so left but love u
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
