how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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