So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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