fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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