I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
