Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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