the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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