What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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