We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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