love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize
