How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
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