I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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