he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
