Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize