it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
