just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
