grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
