Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
