You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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