i just wanna soil my oats bro
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
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