I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
