I'm gonna have a badass scar
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
