ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
