At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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