watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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