Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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