People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
