Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
