Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?