I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
