i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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