Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
