Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before

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(516): I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before http://tfl.nu/l3md

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(214): View more from Texas

You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.

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(214): You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet. http://tfl.nu/ajf1

Replies (23) Good night (7620) Bad night (1142)
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(734): View more from Michigan

I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.

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(734): I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out. http://tfl.nu/oiev

Replies (5) Good night (2991) Bad night (1343)
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(646): View more from New York

But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.

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(646): But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet. http://tfl.nu/nifm

Replies (21) Good night (1972) Bad night (4178)
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(301): View more from Maryland

She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....

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(301): She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice.... http://tfl.nu/0ncm

Replies (10) Good night (6018) Bad night (1270)
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(847): View more from Illinois

He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.

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(847): He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street. http://tfl.nu/tq30

Replies (7) Good night (3132) Bad night (1183)
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(847): View more from Illinois

In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her

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(847): In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her http://tfl.nu/qgyz

Replies (5) Good night (2458) Bad night (905)
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(720): View more from Colorado

I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.

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(720): I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer. http://tfl.nu/jm0p

Replies (7) Good night (542) Bad night (1248)
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(541): View more from Oregon

After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.

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(541): After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave. http://tfl.nu/k4g0

Replies (5) Good night (882) Bad night (1124)
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(562): View more from California

I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.

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(562): I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch. http://tfl.nu/mth4

Replies (2) Good night (1312) Bad night (391)
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(716): View more from New York

tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"

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(716): tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered" http://tfl.nu/w7hl

Replies (0) Good night (603) Bad night (359)
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(217): View more from Illinois

Do one night stands count towards my number?

(516): View more from New York

Yes. A penis is a penis

(217): View more from Illinois

Even bad ones?

(516): View more from New York

YES.

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(217): Do one night stands count towards my number? (516): Yes. A penis is a penis (217): Even bad ones? (516): YES. http://tfl.nu/iyle

Replies (0) Good night (743) Bad night (490)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead

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(405): Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead http://tfl.nu/0hvl

Replies (1) Good night (491) Bad night (364)
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(857): View more from Massachusetts

You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun

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(857): You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun http://tfl.nu/b2w1

Replies (0) Good night (480) Bad night (307)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.

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(412): At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center. http://tfl.nu/9xaw

Replies (0) Good night (171) Bad night (259)

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