You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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