can u get pink eye on your cock?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
