It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
