Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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