i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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