I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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