did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Too much gin, very little bucket
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
there is glitter all over my balls
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
