i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize