I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
