this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
