Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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