i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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