My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
