I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
