I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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